Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Hasta luego, snack in a bag

Today was a very sad day for me and Wolfie.  A day of disappointment and unrealized dreams. 

Shortly after I resumed schlepping to school duties last month, with all the trees and shrubs still winter bare, I noticed something gross in a long row of bushes across the street from the horse farm on Butler Pike.  It was a large ziploc bag, stuffed with a mysterious orange snack-based substance and hanging pregnantly from one of the bare branches.  I can't remember the first time I saw it.  Perhaps I commented to Woog, perhaps not. 

But as the days passed and still the snack remained, I usually tried to point it out.  I could never figure out what, exactly, was in the bag.  First I thought it was Cheez Its, then Apple Jacks, then maybe Doritos or something.  Whatever it was, it captured Wolfie's imagination, much like a cup in a tree at the Broad Axe intersection did a few years ago when Eli was still going to preschool.  Yet he never managed to actually spot it.  I always pointed it out too late, forgetting until the last second that the bushes were approaching.

So today, after a few days of not thinking about it, I said to Wolfie as soon as we set out "today you're going to see that snack in a bag in a dead old bush!"  So I concentrated on getting my bearings long before getting into the proximity of the bush, and he was primed and ready to see that rotten old snack in a bag.  Sadly, though, we discovered the bushes in full leaf and the snack in a bag long gone and, as far as I can tell, unseen by Woogish eyes.

A song for the snack in a bag, sung to the tune of Zeb-favorite Frosty the Snowman:

Snacky the bag
Was a plastic bag of food
And it hung there in that dead old bush
Until someone had it removed

There must have been some rotten food
In that gross bag that we found
'Cuz when we ate up that old snack
We barfed it back up on the ground

And that's what I do with my days.

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